Do you want the best in life? Do you have the drive necessary to achieve the best for yourself? Whether you want to create extraordinary relationships, develop an amazing career, get paid to do what you love, or live in your dream house, this is the episode for you!
Today, we’re going to discuss a secret technique for creating the direction and momentum you need to go after the best in life.
Side note: If this is your first time checking in with me, you’re probably wondering where I come up with this material. My name is Dr. Aziz Gazipura, and while I have a doctorate in clinical psychology, I have a passion for helping people to achieve their highest levels of confidence so that they have the best chance of achieving everything they want in life! I am constantly educating myself as much as possible on the subject, not just through academic research, but also through my work with clients, both one-on-one and in group sessions. Every time I come across a fascinating insight or breakthrough concept, whether in my own life or working with a client, I write it down and share it with you, either here or in my podcast, Shrink for The Shy Guy. No matter who you are, you’re sure to get something out of these discussions, so please feel free to subscribe to my channel and check out my podcast (or my website, SocialConfidenceCenter.com)!
Now, back to the subject at hand: the best things in life.
Work Trumps Wishing
Many books and doctrines will tell you that all you have to do is open yourself up to your desires to get what you want—that you already deserve everything you could possibly want.
My take is a little different.
In my mind, you have to be your best to deserve the best. Sure, you should be open to receiving it . . . but you’ve also got to step up, build your confidence, and develop your greatness day after day.
When you think of wanting the best, what do you picture? The best clothes? The best career? The most money? The best body? Whatever drives you—whether it’s fame, happiness, freedom, or financial success—you’re going to have to work for it if you want the best.
Cal Newport wrote a book called, So Good They Can’t Ignore You. He got it. So did Jim Rohn, who said, “Work harder on yourself than you do on your job.”
“Affirmation without discipline is the beginning of delusion.”
It’s not enough just to dream about something, have faith, or to be the most passionate—if you want to get the most out of life, you have to get to work and earn it.
Application and Attitude
The argument I usually get at this point is, “But how am I supposed to work on myself when all I want out of life is love?” These people clearly never heard the saying, “You can’t expect anyone else to love you if you don’t love yourself.”
The concept of self-improvement works in all applications. Saying it doesn’t is just a way of looking to get out of doing the work.
Let’s say you want to improve your dating life: your self-improvement work needs to be on increasing your self-awareness and your self-worth so that you can eradicate all of the old stories you’ve told yourself about how you’re not good, attractive, or valuable enough.
If you’re looking to work on your self-esteem, you can check out my programs, The Confidence Code or 30 Days to Dating Mastery—both offer great tactics for building up your self-worth while supplying practical tools for social interaction.
In the meantime, you can’t attract the most amazing people if you think that you suck. That’s just common sense. It doesn’t just stop there, though! Even if you think you’re amazing, you might have other work to do: you might need to work on your listening skills or work on approaching people in social situations or get better at staying authentic . . . it could be anything!
There are endless resources out there (I’ve already listed a couple other motivational thinkers above), and no matter what you might be working toward in your life, the right inspiration is out there for you to absorb! In other words: I should not be the only person who you’re learning from.
I am always looking for the next way to build myself up and reach the next level of excellence, both in my work and personal lives . . . and it doesn’t make me a crazy, neurotic person, either.
You might start this journey from a place of believing you’re not enough—that you are lacking in some way (I know I did). Eventually, though, you will get to the point where you realize that you really can master anything if you’re willing to put in the work . . . and that’s when it becomes exciting and fun!
If you’re watching this channel, my sense is that you’re a little bit like me: you want to improve every aspect of your life to its fullest potential. This idea that you can keep growing and learning and becoming a better version of yourself can become addictive. Opening yourself up to receiving and clearing your mental blocks is great—I like the woo-woo stuff too . . . but if you really want to see tangible growth and break through the plateaus you’ve been hitting, you need to roll up your sleeves and get to work. You won’t regret it.
What do you want the best in? What is your number one self-improvement goal? What’s holding you back from taking the first step in your self-improvement journey? Please share your comments and questions below so that we can all continue to learn from each other. I love to read about your experiences and know that this work is making a difference. Until we speak again, may you have the courage to be who you are and to know on a deep level that you’re awesome.
Latest posts by Dr. Aziz (see all)
- You’re Going To Fail - December 13, 2018
- How To Ask Out Someone With Social Anxiety – Dr. Aziz Q&A - December 11, 2018
- But I Keep Getting Rejected! – Q&A with Dr. Aziz - November 29, 2018