Do you believe that other people are better than you? Do you believe there is something inherent in your personality that makes it impossible for people to connect with you?
Today’s discussion is very important to me because I want to share a part of my story—and I believe it may be part of your story as well.
When I was in college, I would often go out to parties with my roommate, Tim. We might have gone to a hundred parties over those four years . . . and at every single one (without fail), within two minutes, he’d be chatting up other guys and meeting cute girls. I, on the other hand (without fail), would be in the corner holding up the wallpaper.
This was always so depressing to me: I couldn’t understand why it came so easily to him and why didn’t come to me at all, easily or otherwise.
I’d look at him and tell myself that he just had something that I didn’t have—and never would.
So, obviously, I’ve come a long way since then . . . but how did I do it? The truth is that I simply committed myself to two little words: learn confidence.
Believe it or not, you can learn confidence. I don’t care if you’re so scared of other people that you barely ever talk above a whisper—you can learn confidence. Trust me: I’ve seen it happen.
Over the years, I’ve literally worked with thousands of people, and if there is one thing I’ve learned, it’s that this is something that absolutely anyone can do. If you simply approach it like a skill (which it is!), then you will learn the techniques, practice them, gain confidence in yourself over time, and eventually turn that confidence around so that it faces the outside world.
Now, I want you to check in with yourself for a moment: is one of your old “stories” creeping up and telling you that you’re the exception? Is there some malicious voice in the back of your mind telling you that you’re too short or too fat or too bald or too shy?
Well, whatever that useless story is, it’s time to SHUT IT DOWN.
No matter what you’ve experienced in your life—trauma, bad upbringing, embarrassment, personal flaws—you can learn confidence.
But how do we do it?
Well, as mentioned above, it’s a process. And I’m not going to sugarcoat it—it’s not an easy one. But it is effective! In fact, I’m so confident in the process that I want to share it with you for free.
Step One – Challenge the Old Stories
Like I already said, you may have a million and one “old stories” running through your mind every single day—stories about how you’re not good enough or smart enough or strong enough to be of any value.
Those old stories are trash . . . and you need to treat them as such. You must be willing to question their reality, believe that you have worth, and then test a new reality that holds more promise.
Step Two – Take Bold Action
This is where things get a little more challenging—but so much more rewarding!
In order to unlearn your old habits (and kick those old stories to the curb), you need to keep challenging them by pushing the edge of your comfort zone and disproving the beliefs that don’t serve you . . . and you need to do it again and again and again.
Obviously, this is a very quick breakdown of the first two steps (and there are many more to come!), but you can find much more detail and guidance in my free eBook, 5 Steps to Unleash Your Inner Confidence. This one book lays out all of the most basic principles that you need to apply to build up your social confidence and go after the life you’ve always wanted for yourself. If you want to take that first leap toward your ultimate confidence, then visit my website, SocialConfidenceCenter.com to download it.
You have the power to change your life if you’re willing to do the work.
Please share any thoughts, concerns or experiences that you have with this work in the comments below so that we can continue to learn and grow together.
Until we speak again, may you have the courage to be who you are and to know on a deep level that you’re awesome.