Is It Good to Lie to Yourself?

Jan 10, 2024

The Journey to Being Your Own Best Ally

In a world where self-criticism and fear of rejection hold sway, Dr. Aziz, a renowned psychologist and coach, offers a beacon of hope. He addresses a critical question from a client about self-honesty and support. This forms the core of his transformative teaching: Are we really on our own side?

The Truth About Self-Compassion

Dr. Aziz delves into the nuances of being self-supportive. His book, 'On My Own Side', explores this concept deeply. The challenge, as he points out, lies in treating ourselves with the same kindness and understanding we reserve for our loved ones.

Most people are their own harshest critics. Being on your own side means treating yourself with the compassion and respect you'd show a dear friend.


Balancing Honesty and Compassion

Dr. Aziz uses a relatable example of his children's music lessons to illustrate the balance between truth and support. Telling his child that not practicing would still lead to mastery would be untruthful. Instead, he advocates for a blend of honesty and encouragement, asking meaningful questions to guide one toward their true desires and goals.

Encouraging honest self-reflection is crucial. It's about acknowledging your actions and desires and aligning them with your goals.

Applying These Lessons to Overcome Social Anxiety

For professionals struggling with social anxiety and self-doubt, Dr. Aziz's message is clear: Confront your actions and desires honestly. If you're holding back in meetings, ask yourself why and what you truly want. This self-inquiry is the first step towards meaningful change.

Practical Steps for Self-Improvement

Dr. Aziz doesn't just stop at theory. He offers practical advice: Start looking for small opportunities to express yourself, be it in meetings or casual conversations. This approach is about gradual improvement and taking small, manageable steps towards your goal.

Explore More with Dr. Aziz

For those seeking further guidance, Dr. Aziz invites them to explore his book and other resources. His website,, offers a wealth of information, including a free 10-day Quick Start course to jumpstart your journey to self-confidence.


Reading blogs and watching videos online is a start...

When you are ready to radically transform your confidence so you speak up freely, boldly go after what you want, connect easily with others and be 100% unapologetically yourself, coaching is the answer.

Discover Dr. Aziz's Confidence Mastermind